Furniture Wish List

We are not buying any new large items for a while, due to continued unemployment in the household. So, of course, this is the time when things decide to fall apart. So I am writing a wishlist for the universe.

Dear universe, my household needs:

A new couch.
A new office chair.
Two new mattresses.
A new bookcase to replace the broken one in my office.
Another new bookcase for the breakfast nook.

Or, most preferably:

A new job for G. or me or both, so we can afford to buy any and all of the above.

I think that will cover it for now.

Uhh...What?

"As you are FULLY aware, Melissa, teabagging is a gay practice of men laying their scrotums on another man's face and photographing that action for humor."


(In the comments to this otherwise unrelated article, if you're curious.)