pantryslut

I'm going in for a C-section tomorrow morning.

Last night's breastfeeding class was refreshingly diverse compared to other recent encounters I've had. OK, everyone was strangely *thin*, except the instructor, but that's another story, really. And oddly, I was the only one with twins. Considering my obs/gyn has, I believe, *five* patients with pending twins, three of them 'natural' sets...

But there was one thing that united us all, young and old, big and small, wearing chic Empire-waist maternity wear or Juno-esque sweatpants and t-shirts (uh, that would be me).

Footwear.

There was one woman there in traditional sneakers. Every other pregnant person present, including me, was wearing some variation of slip-on sandal, flip-flop, or thong. (I can't call them thongs. Thongs are for underwear.)

In at least four cases, the women were wearing what I guess would be best described as a flip-flop wedgie. (Wedgies are for shoes *and* underwear.) I confess, I do not quite understand the purpose of the flip-flop wedgie. Flat flip-flops, sure. I'd wear 'em too if I didn't need real arch support. But the wedge heel plus the flimsy frontpiece just looks...uncomfortable to me. I know, here I go again having this idea that footwear should be *comfortable*. That's probably where I'm going wrong.

You have to understand, it's gratifying to see all these women wearing such flimsy footwear. I look forward to the day I see someone in their bedroom slippers. All I can wear these days, with one or two exceptions, are my Birkenstocks, and I keep wondering, how do other women cope with water retention and swollen feet? I glance under the tables at Alta Bates, and I know. And I feel better. I have become a secret voyeur of pregnant lady feet.

I think it was badgerbag who wondered when we'd get the first live-blogged account of someone in labor.

Liveblogging? That's so 2007!

Tweeting your delivery, otoh...

(P.S. to anyone wondering: no to both.)

The hit of the baby shower yesterday was clearly Rockabye Baby's Lullabye Renditions of Nine Inch Nails. That's right, instrumental lullabye versions of songs like "Hurt," "Closer," and "Head Like a Hole," done on vibraphone and mellotron. Seriously fucking charming -- not at all a one-joke pony, I'm telling you. Don't believe me? Come on over to my house for a listen sometime.

So thank you, fightingtiger, for the Best Shower Gift Evar -- and also for co-hosting, making delicious foodstuffs, and while I'm here, just for being such a stand-up kind of guy. Thanks too to wild_irises for co-hosting and cupcakes (cupcakes!).

This praise is not, however, meant in any way to detract from the charm of tie-dyed onesies, hats knitted to look like eggplants, "noob" and "badass," A Field Guide to Stains, and bug books in Spanish, and so on, and so forth. Roomba and Scooba have a great set of baby schwag to look forward to once they're done cooking.

Also, I really, really love my friends. 'Cuz really, it's about the company and support, not the stuff. It was one of those "smiled so hard my face hurts" kind of afternoons for me yesterday.

Sometimes the process of getting ready for birth feels like studying for a final exam. There are books to read, equipment to purchase, checklists and more checklists, classes to take, appointments to make, plans and strategies. And it doesn't pay to cram at the last minute!

And then, when I pass and graduate, the real fun begins.

1. I have strange dark hairs sprouting all over my body, and the areas of my body that were already hairy are now lush. If I were that kind of girl, I would now need serious professional help to denude my legs.
2. Skin tags continue to proliferate.
3. Pigmentation changes are true! My moles are all darker, and I have more freckles and blotches and things.
4. My feet hurt from the extra weight, especially my right heel, and I'm not sure what to do about it other than sit down a lot.
5. Sneezing feels weird b/c my diaphragm isn't where I remember leaving it.
6. Water retention in my feet is reaching silly levels.
7. Blood pressure is still a little high.
8. My nipples ache. And they are officially leaking colostrum at odd intervals.
9. Congestion and the occasional bloody nose are back.
10. Listen to my joints pop!

I am also inordinately fond of this photo from Saturday. Better than an upskirt :)

I am the proud owner of a shiny new diagnosis of Pregnancy-Induced Hypertension (PIH). In other words, the twins are *already* giving me high blood pressure, and they haven't even done anything yet. ;)

Many thanks to goodbadgirl for giving me a ride to the hospital and then sitting with me through an appointment that turned out to be much, much longer than expected. It meant we had all afternoon to talk! And admire the very competent and friendly nurse.

Then they put me on drugs. Labetalol, for those playing along at home.

I'm feeling fine, the babies are fine (kicking the heart monitor!). I'm ready to see more of my couch and less of the inside of a medical office, though.

ETA: I am noticing that several online resources discussing PIH state that it's synonymous with preeclampsia. This is not the case here. I do not have preeclampsia (at the moment) -- there's no protein in my urine. Just high blood pressure.

Dear Many Moms (and Other Caretakers) on My Friend's List,

I am trying to pull together a baby registry for the many nice people who keep asking after it. (It's also functioning as a general shopping list reminder for me.) I've made some progress, but I think now, I could use some advice. Some advice from real people that I know, who are not middle-class heterosexual women who drive cars, if you know what I mean.

What kind of baby gear should I be buying and/or asking for from folks? What did you find helpful to have around?

What should I absolutely put on my registry? What isn't necessary, but would be nice to ask for (and/or obtain for myself)? What might be a useful and appreciated luxury?

I am totally torn between my frugal and minimalist tendencies, and the fact that, duh, this is a registry, it's a *list* for people who want to *give me things*, playing "I don't really need that" is not actually necessarily helpful.

Anyway.

Materialism. Lay it on me. Thanks!

It's harder to use the laptop (at least in my preferred, approaching-ergonomically-appropriate fashion) when you have less lap than you used to...